Monday, August 29, 2005
Mixed Feelings
I've run into the daughter of the woman I was married to in the past week. I still sorta think of her of my stepdaughter, but now that her mom and I have separated, I'm not sure of the officaial term that covers her "status."
She has a six week old daughter. The baby is beautiful. Even more than most babies (although that may be just my soak in the pleasure attitude). I was running around the first time we ran across each other and like an idiot I forgot to ask the baby's name. The second time I ran into her I did remember to ask. I told the new mom to let me know if there was anything I could do to help out and let me know how things were.
The mixed feelings come in that I'm not really attached to the new mom anymore. When I was married to her mom and she lived with us we got along mostly well, although we were too alike to get along great. As she was getting older, and less under her mom's and my control, that relationship didn't get any better. So now, I'm a stepgrandpa, sorta removed. I am as happy as heck that the baby is well and has all the fingers and toes. But I feel a bit more like I should do something special since this is my stepdaughter's kid even though the mom and I split up. I guess I'll try to figure out the proper balance of pride and happiness, but I'm not sure where that is.
I didn't realize it but that first encounter affected me more than I thought it would. The next day I was in as good of mood as a bear with a bug up his arse. I didnt even realize that until my boss asked me why I was being so miserable. And when I act like that, there is something up.
I did drop a line to the estranged to congratulate her. I wasn't sure if that was proper or not but figured it was. She sent a note back saying thanks. That's good.
She has a six week old daughter. The baby is beautiful. Even more than most babies (although that may be just my soak in the pleasure attitude). I was running around the first time we ran across each other and like an idiot I forgot to ask the baby's name. The second time I ran into her I did remember to ask. I told the new mom to let me know if there was anything I could do to help out and let me know how things were.
The mixed feelings come in that I'm not really attached to the new mom anymore. When I was married to her mom and she lived with us we got along mostly well, although we were too alike to get along great. As she was getting older, and less under her mom's and my control, that relationship didn't get any better. So now, I'm a stepgrandpa, sorta removed. I am as happy as heck that the baby is well and has all the fingers and toes. But I feel a bit more like I should do something special since this is my stepdaughter's kid even though the mom and I split up. I guess I'll try to figure out the proper balance of pride and happiness, but I'm not sure where that is.
I didn't realize it but that first encounter affected me more than I thought it would. The next day I was in as good of mood as a bear with a bug up his arse. I didnt even realize that until my boss asked me why I was being so miserable. And when I act like that, there is something up.
I did drop a line to the estranged to congratulate her. I wasn't sure if that was proper or not but figured it was. She sent a note back saying thanks. That's good.
